Here we are.

Thursday, November 15, 2012

The last several months have been such a whirlwind and there are moments where I wonder how we got here.  I was heavily pregnant when we were preparing for the move and then made the move with a 4 week old, so a lot of things are quite a blur to me.

When we first arrived in the states, the main thing that was on my mind was getting to spend time with my parents where I could recover and adjust to life as a mom of two.  I found the first weeks and months quite challenging the first time around and I knew that this time I needed more support around me.  I wasn't thinking much about the enormity of the move - I was too sleep deprived!  My main focus was caring for the children and between that and resting when I could... the days flew by.

When we moved out of my parent's home and into our own place, the reality of the move started to become more apparent.  All of a sudden we were having to make so many decisions, decisions that meant we were making a commitment to this new place.  It scared me a lot.  I felt worried about being tied down.  I wanted to have an easy exit plan in case things didn't work.  But I had wanted to make this move.  We had felt confirmation that we should make this move.  We had prayed a lot about this move and felt that God had made it clear to us to move.  And we want to make it work.

And this is where we are at.  There are ups and there are downs.  We have experienced so much generosity and kindness in our few short months in our new city.  We see opportunities and potential.  We have been inspired by the lives of people we have met and how they invest in this city.  Seeds of friendships have been planted.  Old friendships enjoyed.

And yet there is sadness.  It settles in in quiet moments.  It is stirred up when speaking to friends or seeing photos.  Reminders of milestones missed - the birth of a friend's baby, a pregnancy, a 30th birthday party.

I am aware more and more that wherever we are, we will be missing someone or something.  Yet on the other hand I feel so incredibly grateful.  Grateful for the beautiful people and places that have filled my life.  Grateful to have shared so much life with people that the absence is deeply felt.  What an amazing blessing.  

A day at a time.

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